


The Three Faces Of Emily

by greengirl82



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Altered Mental States, Angst and Humor, F/M, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Mental Health Issues, Multiple Personalities
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-11
Updated: 2012-06-17
Packaged: 2017-11-07 12:06:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/431005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greengirl82/pseuds/greengirl82
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ian Doyle is dead and Emily's back from exile. With a less than warm welcome from those she left behind, Emily's back at the BAU. But she had one more secret...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Emily, Millie and Mia

"If we don't see a failure as a challenge to modify our approach, but rather as a problem with ourselves, as a personality deflect, we will become overwhelmed." Tony Robbins

* * *

"Check again." Mia ordered "We can't leave anything to chance."

"I'm checking, I'm checking." Emily said kneeling next to the body, checking a pulse. "He's dead."

"Good." Millie said "Now that Doyle is dead, we need to get rid of the body. Dump him in the river. Let the sharks feed off his flesh."

Mia smirked, "Nice to know that prick contributed something in death."

"Focus, Mia." Millie said "Emily, in the back of the car, grab the plastic tarp and wrap Doyle in it. He can be placed in the back of the car and dumped along the French river."

Emily wandered back to the car, pulling out the tarp and feeling her head pound, exhaling she returned and wrapped Ian's body in it. Never once looking at the bullet hole she shot through his skull.

"Glad that's done with." Mia said, "I hated having to look over my shoulder waiting for the other shoe to drop with Doyle."

"You had to look over your shoulder?" Emily said indignant "I'm the one that had to give up everything and everyone I've ever cared about in order to fake my own death."

Mia huffed while Millie said, "You know why you had to do it, Emily. The plan with faking your death insured the safety of your team. It had to be done. It was unavoidable. You had to suffer this pain in order to protect your friends. You wanted them to be kept away from Doyle, now that he's dead your suffering is over."

"I know." Emily said closing the tarp on Doyle's body. "Time to get to work."

 

Emily stood in front of the mirror looking at her reflection, stripped bare down to her bra and panties, she sighed.

"You've lost far too much weight, Emily." Millie said "You need to start eating, you don't want to end up in the hospital again, do you?"

"No." Emily said turning on the faucet making sure the water is hot.

"Hurry up" Mia said bored "I want to go out tonight."

Emily sighed as she started washing her face, "I don't feel like going out tonight."

"Too bad" Mia said "We did what you wanted, now it's your turn to do what I want. And I want to go out, meet a guy and have some fun."

"Mia" Emily said groaning "I just want to sleep."

"Then sleep, but I'm going out." Mia told Emily "You know that."

"Don't push her" Millie told Mia "We both know what will happen if you do."

Groaning, Mia said, "Well it's my turn and I want to go out."

"Fine." Emily said "I don't care anymore."

"Mia," Millie said in an authoritative tone "We can't let them find us. They won't understand, we're leaving tonight. With Doyle dead, it's safe for us to leave."

"No" Mia said "I'm not leaving, I like it here. I'm not going back."

Emily whispered "I want to go home now."

Emily winced when she heard Mia's voice say, "You think they're just going to let you waltz right back into their lives? After you systematically blew theirs apart? You got a member of your old team killed. He targeted your friends and threatened them because of you. Do you think they're just going to welcome you back with open arms?"

"Knock it off Mia." Millie told her "You don't get a say in Emily's life. She's going back home and we have to let her."

"No" Mia said "They'll never accept her, they'll never understand her. We can protect her."

Emily walked out of the bathroom trying to tune out the two women's voices, Mia's panicked words ringing in her ears.

"We have to let her go." Millie told Mia.

Emily pulled on a tank top, and sweat pants and said, "I'm going to bed. I'll either see you or I won't in the morning, but I am going back to America."

Emily crashed on the bed, trying to tune out the voices and heard Mia say, "You still need us. You'll call us back."

 

Walking into a seedy Parisian bar, she walked over to the bartender and flashed a smirk at the young man.

"How may I help you?" the bartender said in French.

"Martini, very dry." Mia said eyeing the young man.

Mia looked across the bar, as the bartender placed her drink in front of her, she downed it quickly throwing some money on the counter turning her attention to a dark haired man looking at her.

Walking over to the pool table, Mia leaned down staring at the young man.

"Yes?" the man said eyeing the ample cleavage of the beautiful woman.

"What's a good looking guy like you doing here all by yourself?" Mia asked.

"Looking for a good time, you?" the man said sitting on the edge of the pool table.

"Just looking." Mia said "Follow me."

Mia wandered into the empty ladies room, and leaned against the sink seeing the handsome young man come in.

"Do this often?" the man asked Mia "I'm Josh by the way."

"Mia" Mia said "Do this often? Pick up good looking guys? Maybe..."

Josh rushed at her, pulling her close to him, forcing his lips on her, while Mia pulled at his zipper.

 

Moving his mouth to her neck, Mia groaned when she heard her cell phone ring.

"Don't answer it." Josh said pulling at the strap of the dark blue dress, bringing his hand down on her breast.

"Have to" Mia said pulling out the phone, while Josh nipped at her neck, groaning as she saw the caller id, "What?"

 _"I saw the news,"_ JJ said " _I'm so glad it's all over now."_

"Hardly" Mia said "Anything else?"

 _"Are you ok?"_ JJ asked _"You sound funny?"_

"I'm fine, JJ" Mia said "Just a little distracted."

 _"It's time to come home."_ JJ told her _"We all miss you, Emily."_

Josh pulled back when he heard her groan in pain, rubbing her temple as her voice changed into a distant cold one.

Groaning Millie said into the phone, "I'll be on the first plane home in the morning."

 _"Em?"_ JJ said concerned _"Are you ok? Have you been talking to your therapist?"_

"I've seen Dr. Wayne several times since my incident." Millie said voice professional while Josh tried going back to her neck "He said I've handle everything in an appropriate manner and there was no need for further visits."

 _"Ok."_ JJ said relieved _"Call me when you get on the plane, Hotch and I want to make sure the team knows before you just pop into town."_

"Ok, good night." Millie said hanging up, while Mia struggled for control.

"Baby" Josh said "Whatever that was, I hope it's over..."

"Get off of me" Mia said angrily, pushing the confused man off her, as she walked out the door.

 

 _'Mia'_ Millie said as the brunette walked back in the hotel room _'Give Emily control.'_

"No" Mia said to herself "I'm in control and I am not going away."

 _'You are not the host personality'_ Millie told Mia _'As the gatekeeper...'_

"Gatekeeper, gatekeeper" Mia mimicked "Just because you're the emotionless robot out of all of us, doesn't give you the right to dictate my life."

 _'It's not your life, Mia'_ Millie said _'It's Emily's. You're not real. This is Emily's body. We are merely specters of her psyche.'_

"I don't need a psychiatric lesson." Mia said "I know everything that you do."

 _'Then you know that it is not appropriate to take over Emily's life_.' Millie said _'We were created to protect her.'_

"And we did," Mia said "I protected her from those criminals she track down with those lame FBI agents. I protected her from that bastard who beat her at that cult, and I protected her from Ian Doyle. I deserve a break too."

 _'Your job is to protect her'_ Millie informed her _'Not to switch back and forth as a trade. This is a life, not a car dealership.'_

Groaning, Mia wandered over to the mirror, and looked at their reflection. The reflection of Emily Prentiss, but saw Millie with her hair pulled back into a bun, in a crisp white business top, and black slacks looking at her.

 _'You either let Emily out right now, or I'll make sure you're locked up forever, Mia.'_ Millie told her _'And I can do it.'_

"You can't do that." Mia told her, "You wouldn't do that."

 _'My_ _job is to protect the host personality'_ Millie said _"And ensure she's in tact, and I will do whatever it takes to protect Emily.'_

Groaning, "Fine but know this Millie, I hate you."

 _'I can live with that.'_ Millie said watching Mia let go of control, letting Emily take over as she slept.

 

Waking up with a start, Emily hears Millie tell her, _'Agent Jareau called, while Mia took your body for a spin._ '

"What?" Emily asked "She did what?"

 _'Nothing transpired'_ Millie assured her, _'You're going home first thing in the morning. Agent Jareau wants you to call her before you board the airplane. To warn your former team."_

"Ok." Emily said.

 _'Don't worry about, Mia'_ Millie assured in her distant tone _'She won't bother you.'_

"Stress caused the integration to fail. I can't compartmentalize all this." Emily said more to herself then to the alter.

 _'If something needs to be done, I'll ensure it's done with out Mia's interference.'_ Millie assured.

Emily looked out her Paris hotel, and saw the sun rising up, walking over to the bathroom she glanced in the mirror and winced when she saw the marks on her neck.

'Thanks alot Mia.' Emily thought, 'Look what the team gets to see first thing when they learn I'm alive.'

 _'I was having a blast before your little barbie doll friend interrupted me.'_ Mia said _'So thank her for me with an foot up her bleach blonde ass.'_

"Yeah, right." Emily muttered getting ready to leave for the airport.

 

Standing in the terminal, Emily hoped that Millie could keep Mia under control.

She could handle Millie, she was a rule follower if those rules consisted of protecting Emily, others didn't stand a chance. It was Millie's plan that successfully got Doyle dead for good.

Pulling out her cell phone, Emily dialed JJ.

"It's Emily." Emily said "I'm about to board the plane, so how are you going to tell the team?"

 _"Very carefully."_ JJ assured _"I just hope they can forgive us."_

"Fat chance of that." Emily said heading on to the plane as she hung up her cell phone.

* * *

**To Be Continued...**


	2. The Return

Emily rubbed her hands on her temples as she heard the flight attendant say that it was safe to take off the safety belts, making her rush to pull hers off and rush for the bathroom.

"Breathe." Emily told herself "Everything will be ok, just breathe."

_'Aw, is little Emmy having a hard time making it through a plane ride?'_ Mia taunted.

"Shut up." Emily said quietly "You're locked up."

_'What's the matter? Memories rushing back now that you're headed for the states?'_ Mia taunted _'Or more to the fact that playing Lauren was just a little too much like me?'_

"I'm nothing like you or Lauren." Emily muttered.

_'Says the girl talking to herself.'_ Mia said _'Sounds like you're going crazy... Ha, yep, we all go a little crazy. But two alters? Woo. Coo coo.'_

Emily ran her hands through her hair muttering, "Leave me alone, Mia."

_'Ah why?'_ Mia taunted _'I'm having so much fun, now that Millie is busy_.'

"Busy?" Emily repeated "Millie wouldn't abandoned me."

_'Had to distract her for a bit._ ' Mia _said 'She's worried that I'm going to hurt little old you. We both know I wouldn't do that.'_

Emily stood up straight, looking in the mirror only to see Mia stare back at her in a dark black top "Knock it off."

 

A knock interrupted Emily from her fight, temporarily seizing control over her alter, "Yes?"

"Miss?" a woman's voice said "Are you alright? You've been in there for quite awhile."

Looking at her own reflection, Emily straightened the turtle neck she was wearing, "I'm fine. I'll be right out."

Emily unlocked the door, and opened the door, "Sorry."

_'Chicken.'_ Mia taunted.

_'Leave her alone.'_ Millie ordered loudly, causing Emily to cover her ears as she passed by some noisy passengers.

"Quiet" Emily murmured to her inner voices, sitting down in her seat.

 

JJ stood in the terminal, double checking her watch for the arrival time. Nervous was the emotion that ran through her at first, followed by anxious and excitement.

Sighing as she double checked the time, she went over the bombshell she dropped on the team with Hotch less than twenty minutes ago and played with her fingernails, a habit she picked up from Emily.

Pacing around the terminal she couldn't get the look of disbelief and hurt of the BAU teams face.

"She's alive?" Reid asked trying to wrap his genius mind around the concept "How?"

"After Doyle stabbed her, she was rushed into emergency surgery. Hotch and I came up with a plan that was signed off by Strauss and a lot of higher ups, to temporarily place Emily in witness protection, until she fully recovered. Then she could choose to or not, return to Interpol to handle Doyle." JJ said.

"Is she ok?" Garcia asked, looking from JJ to Hotch "She is coming back, right?"

"Was Doyle eliminated?" Morgan asked angry, feeling betrayal and distrust in three of his longtime friends.

"Doyle's dead" Hotch said, "Prentiss took him out."

"When is she coming back?" Dave asked.

The four shocked BAU team members where shocked to see Hotch and JJ exchange looks.

"She is coming back, right?" Reid asked.

"She's coming back to the States" Hotch said "Whether she chooses to rejoin the BAU is up to her."

"Well of course she'll want to rejoin the team" Garcia said "We're her family."

Morgan got up walking out of the conference room, as he huffed out "Some family."

JJ could only watch as he sat at his desk in the bullpen, as she left to meet Emily's plane.

 

'They'll accept her back,' JJ thought to herself as she ran her hand through her blonde hair, 'It's just going to take some time.'

JJ saw Emily's plane deboard and she felt herself relax for the first time since seeing Emily lying in a hospital bed recovering from major surgery.

Emily walked out with her head down feeling the weight everything she'd been through.

"Emily!" JJ shouted as people rushed past to leave the airport "Emily."

Emily's head shot up, and JJ noticed her face, contort in tension but then relax into a small smile.

JJ rushed over throwing her arms around the brunette "Oh my God, Em."

"Hey, JJ" Emily said trying to relax into the hug.

"How are you?" JJ asked the thin brunette, watching her face intently.

"Fine, just tired but fine." Emily said weary when JJ gave her a look, Emily quickly said, "Don't give me that look, I'm fine. Really."

JJ nodded acquiescing, "Well, we'll get you set up in a hotel to give you a good nights sleep."

Emily smiled feeling herself relax, feeling like she could let go of the breath she'd been holding for months.

"When do you want to see the team?" JJ asked as the two got into the JJ's SUV.

"I don't know" Emily said quietly "I don't think they want to see me."

 

JJ turned the car on the next block, and looked over at her, "Of course they want to see you. They've missed you and are so excited you're back."

_'No they're not'_ Mia taunted causing Emily to wince at the tone.

JJ saw this, "Are you all right?"

"Just a little tired" Emily assured the blonde "I'm ok."

_'Liar, liar pants on fire'_ Mia's voice tauntingly sang out  _'How about telling her, Hey JJ I've got two other personalities living in me? Mind dropping me at the nearest nut house?'_

Emily groaned lightly, wishing that she could shut Mia off.

"Em?" JJ said lightly, worried for her friend "Are you sure you're ok?"

_'Emily'_ Millie said, _'Smile at the agent and tell her you're fine. I'll deal with Mia.'_

Emily turned and smiled at JJ, "Yeah, just a little headache."

JJ nodded, "Are you hungry? We can grab a bite to eat before I drop you at the hotel?"

"No that's ok" Emily lied "I ate on the plane."

"Ok" JJ said raising an eyebrow to Emily 'Of course she came back different. After all she's been through hell and back.'

 

Emily stood in the middle of her hotel room, wondering if coming back was such a great idea.

_'Hey'_ Mia said _'You know what a great idea would be? Going out and getting us laid.'_

"No" Emily told the voice "I'm in charge now. And I will find away to suppress you."

_'How?'_ Mia taunted _'Another shrink?_ _All that did was make sure we stayed. We're the ones that help you beat Doyle.'_

"Shut up, Mia" Emily said laying on the bed "Right after I see the team tomorrow you are gone for good."

_'Fat chance, Emily'_ Mia said _'You need us, you won't survive without us.'_

"I survived for years without you before" Emily said "I can do it again."

_'Really?'_ Mia countered _'Who took that block of the wood to the head for you? Me. Who took that beating at the cult compound for you? Me again. And who took that wooden stake to the stomach? That'd be me. I am stronger than you.'_

_'Mia stop baiting Emily'_ Millie said _'You'll make everything a lot more comfortable if you both do as I say.'_

"I'm not taking orders from either of you" Emily said "I'm taking control of my life. I don't need either of you."

_'Oh look who grew a backbone'_ Mia said _'See that Millie? That's the thanks we get after all we did for her?'_

"All you did?" Emily said "You both are making me insane."

_'Too late for that.'_ Mia said _'Who the hell do you think taught you how to compartmentalize? Her. She's the reason you hardly blink when you face one of those criminals you chase. She's the reason you stood up to that bitch who raised you and that block of ice you call a boss.'_

"You were there when I was a child?" Emily asked "With mother?"

_'You called out for us'_ Millie said _'Being raised by an emotionally distant workaholic mother, who rather shove you off on nannies than spend five minutes outside of a photo op. We helped you cope and deal with it.'_

Emily put her hands over her ears, shaking her head "Stop it, stop it. I don't want to hear anymore."

_'Deal with it, Princess'_ Mia said _'You need us to survive. Or would you rather be a sniveling weakling?'_

"Go away" Emily said loudly.

_'We've been here all a long'_ Mia told her.

 

A knock pulled Emily out of her talk. Walking over to the door, Emily wiped the fallen tears and stood up straight.

Opening the door, Emily saw Hotch standing at her doorway.

"Emily" Hotch said "May I come in?"

Nodding, Emily felt a gnawing doubt hit her stomach as Hotch stood in her room.

"Hey" Emily said "So how was your summer?"

Hotch rolled his eyes at her dry wit, "I wanted to know if you planned to return to the BAU?"

Sitting down at the small table, Emily folded her hands on her lap and looked at him, "I don't know."

"If you plan to return," Hotch told her "We need to know that you're back one hundred percent."

"What are you asking?" Emily asked fearing the worst.

_'You know what he's asking'_ Mia said _'He's questioning your loyalty._ '

"Are you questioning my loyalty to the team?" Emily asked.

Hotch looked at Emily in shock and surprised, "What? No. I know why you did what you did, even if we didn't like it."

"Then what do you mean?" Emily asked worried.

_'Maybe he knows you're crazy'_ Mia taunted _'In that case, no need to worry about Barbie dropping us off at a mental hospital Stone Cold over here will.'_

"Well," Hotch said slowly "If you do plan to rejoin the team, it's not going to be easy."

"Such as?" Emily asked ignoring Mia's taunts and Millie's instructions on closing herself off.

 

Hotch watched Emily, he kept noticing that she looked like her mind was wandering off in some internal debate.

'JJ was right' Hotch thought 'Something is wrong.'

"I know you're no fan of the Bureau psychiatrist" Hotch said seeing a spark of fear in her eyes quickly that disappeared "But Bureau dictates that all returning agents have a mandatory counseling."

"Well I knew that." Emily said letting her sarcasm become evident to hide her secret.

Hotch smirked at that, then said, "I know the team might be a little off with you if you return..."

Emily waved her hand dismissing that, "That's fine, I totally get it. But Hotch do you want me to rejoin your team?"

Hotch sat down on the empty chair, "I do. I really do. You belong with us."

Emily sighed a small breath and said, "Only if you're sure."

"I'm sure" Hotch said smiling at Emily.

_'He's testing you...'_ Mia taunted _'He doesn't really trust you._ '

Emily turned her head, wincing at that.

"Are you ok?" Hotch asked, "Emily?"

Emily turned back to look at him "Fine. When do I go in for recertification?"

Hotch got up and walking for the door, "Tomorrow. Get some sleep, you look really tired."

"Way to make a girl feel special, Hotch." Emily teased closing the door on his smirk.

__

_'_ _How brain dead are you, Emily?'_ Mia taunted _'You really think that block of ice will ever trust you? Remember why you were put on his team. He'll never trust you. Hell he'll never love you.'_

"I don't care if he never loves me" Emily said fighting her resilient alter "Why would that even matter?"

_'You can fool yourself but you can't fool us'_ Mia said _'You love Aaron Hotchner. God only knows why._ '

"Millie stop her" Emily said feeling her mind split in to two.

_'Emily, breathe'_ Millie said _'You won't do yourself any_ _good if you can't breathe.'_

Emily walked over to the hotel window, and took a deep breath, "Breathe. Breathe."

Emily flopped across the bed, telling herself over and over to breathe.

 

Inside Emily's mind, Mia walked over to the window that Millie was next to, and smirked at the uptight cold brunette.

_'I'm getting through to her, she's falling a part'_ Mia said folding her arms across her chest.

_'You must be so proud of yourself, don't you?'_ Millie said walking away from her, dressed in a dark turtle neck and black slacks _'Systematically destroying the one person who you are suppose to protect above all else. You are nothing but a disappointment, Mia.'_

_'You think I'm not protecting her?'_ Mia demanded _'Look at me. I've been protecting her since day one. Those beatings? That damn boss of her's disappearing from that serial killer? Who do you think it was that pulled her through that mess?'_

_'Emotions are a waste of time'_ Millie said _'You are becoming too much of a hassle for Emily to deal with. Which is turning Emily into something she's not, emotional. Trying to break Emily's defenses down to get out? I can't allow that. Now it's time to put you in your place.'_

_'What the hell does that mean?'_ Mia asked looking at her and seeing herself in a cage _'What the hell is this? What are you doing?'_

_'This'_ Millie said walking out slamming the lock on the cage _'Now I'll know where you always are. Behave.'_

Emily tossed and turned in her sleep, but felt herself relaxing into a peaceful sleep.

* * *

**To Be Continued...**


	3. Locked In

Emily stood in front of the Federal Building, trying to calm her nerves.

"You can do this, Emily" Emily whispered to herself, "Everything will be fine."

Emily took one last look at the building as she walked in. Filled with intent that she'd be able to return to the BAU, even if she wouldn't be welcomed by the team, she needed that sense of normalcy.

 _'You made a plan'_ Millie told her _'Stick to the plan, right down to the last detail and everything will fall into place.'_

"I know" Emily whispered as she walked into the elevator.

Emily could feel her stomach knot up as the elevator started to reach the BAU floor and when the doors opened she had to tell herself to walk out.

Keeping her breathing even, Emily walked through the glass doors to the BAU and paused when she saw the back of Reid talking to JJ and Hotch.

JJ looked up from talking to Reid and plastered a smile on her face, as Reid and Hotch turned to see Emily standing in the middle of the bullpen.

"Hey" Emily said biting on her bottom lip.

"Welcome back, Emily" Hotch said watching her scan the bullpen for the others "Morgan's with Garcia, he should be back in a minute."

"And Dave?" Emily asked.

"In his office" JJ said.

Turning her attention back at Reid, Emily's heart dropped when she saw the pain on his face.

 _'Ignore the physical pain of betrayal and smile at Agent Reid. Tell him hello.'_ Millie instructed.

"Hi Reid" Emily said with a small smile on her face.

"Welcome back" Reid said turning his attention back towards his files.

"Thanks" Emily sofltly replied, feeling her stomach drop as she went to her desk to drop her purse on it.

"You can go up and say hi to Dave, then go speak to Strauss and Dr. Lane" Hotch told Emily.

Only nodding, Emily walked up the catwalk, choosing to ignore the watchful eyes of Hotch and JJ and the pained ones of Reid.

Hotch and JJ exchanged looks, while Reid looked up to see Emily wince as she touched her head then knocked on Dave's office.

 _'Focus, Emily'_ Millie said, _'Keep your voice steady and compartmentalize your feelings.'_

Emily heard Dave's voice say, "Come in."

"Dave?" Emily said.

Dave looked over at Emily, and his face turned from shocked to happy.

"Are you busy?" Emily asked lightly seeing his smile.

"Never too busy for a visit." Dave said going over to hug Emily "How are you doing?"

Emily kept herself steady at the hug, "I've had better days, but then I guess so have you."

Pulling out of the hug, Dave noticed a sad look cross her face, "So I heard you took out Doyle yourself?"

"Mm hmm" Emily said "Yeah."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Dave asked.

Emily smirked, "Nah, that's what I got to talk to the Bureau shrink for."

"Well, you ever want to talk, my door is opened." Dave said hugging her again, afraid if he let go she'd disappear.

"Sorry I worried you." Emily said feeling herself relax.

"Shh." Dave said "Don't worry about that."

Looking in the bullpen, Dave saw Hotch look at them with a worried expression.

"I got to go, I got to meet with Strauss then Dr. Lane" Emily said shuddering at that.

Dave said, "And I know how much you hate that."

Emily walked to his door, "Thanks, Dave. For being you."

 

Emily heard a gasp as she walked out of Dave's office and looked down to see Garcia stare at her with tears in her eyes, and Morgan's face looked a combination of hurt and anger.

Keeping her breathing even, Emily kept her head held high as she walked down to the bullpen.

"Hi, guys." Emily said looking at Morgan and Garcia.

"Em?" Garcia asked, tears in her eyes "Is it really you?"

"Yep." Emily said smiling at her, but tensed up when she saw Morgan's look, "Hi Morgan."

"Prentiss." Morgan said tensely "So you're alive?"

"Appears so." Emily said feeling her confidence falter.

 _'Hold strong, Emily'_ Millie ordered _'Do not let him win.'_

"Where's Seaver?" Emily asked looking around.

"Transferred out" Hotch said lightly.

"Why?" Emily asked surprised.

"Budget cuts" Morgan said giving Emily a look, like he was testing her "Are you coming back to the BAU?"

"Hope so," Emily said feeling herself shrink at his words, turning to JJ "I'll be right back."

Emily felt her head pounding, fear taking over. She could feel the alters trying to take over.

Rushing into the ladies room, she leaned against the door, running her hands through her hair, "No, don't come out."

 _'I'm doing this for you'_ Millie said _'I will ensure your future. I'll take care of it.'_

Emily sank to the floor, closing her eyes as she started rocking back and forth.

 

"Was that really necessary?" JJ asked looking at Morgan "We nearly lost Emily, and you go and make her feel like she failed you because she didn't die?"

"What?" Morgan asked "All I did was answer her a question."

"When Prentiss returns to this team, she will be treated with the respect that a fellow agent deserves. No anger or hostility will be tolerated. Is that understood?"

Reid nodded, Garcia did too.

They looked over at Morgan who muttered, "Fine."

Hotch looked over at JJ who said, "I already have been treating her with the respect she deserves."

Looking over at the ladies room, "What's taking Emily so long?"

Morgan snorted as he sat down at his desk, pondering the return of his former partner.

 

Lifting herself off the floor, she walked over to the mirror fixing her straight brown hair into a ponytail.

"Here we go" she said making sure her presence was presentable.

Walking out of the bathroom, she walked over to the members of the BAU in the bullpen, seeing the team look at her.

"I'm ready" she said in a cold monotone that made Hotch looked at her with concern on his face.

"Emily?" JJ asked "Are you ok? We can always reschedule this."

"I'm fine, JJ" she said "I'm ready for the interviews."

JJ nodded with a raised eyebrow, and said "We'll be back."

Reid looked over at the brunette and said, "Good luck, Emily."

"Thank you, Reid" the brunette said, in a professional tone that even had Morgan look at her in surprise.

"See you soon?" Garcia called out to Emily.

"Of course" she said following the blonde media liaison to Strauss' office.

__

_'Well, well, well'_ Mia said walking towards the end of the cage _'Look who decided to visit. What's the matter? Too much pressure for you? Had to call on Millie to take care of it?'_

 _'Ugh'_ Emily said lifting herself off the cot _'Where the hell am I?'_

 _'Not hell but it's a close second'_ Mia said _'Not any where really. But sorta of a safe place. Kind of like we're locked up in one of those little boxes in your mind where we compartmentalized everything.'_

Emily stared at the woman who looked so much like her, _'What am I doing here?'_

 _'You mean you don't know?'_ Mia said faking shock _'You couldn't handle what ever little problem you had going on so Millie had to go take care of it.'_

Emily stared at the cage _'Why are you in there?'_

 _'Millie's idea of a little foreplay'_ Mia said rolling her brown eyes _'She thinks I'm going to hurt you, so she had me locked up. To keep you safe.'_

Emily nodded _'How do I get out of here? To go back?'_

Mia paced back and forth in front of her caged door, _'You_ _can't. Not unless she decides to come back and let you out.'_

 _'Well how did you keep getting out?'_ Emily asked the alter.

Mia smirked as she stared at the agent _'When your defenses were down, you'd slip and I could just take over.'_

Emily groaned _'What the hell is she going to do to me_? _This is my career we're talking about. I can't have her going around talking to the team or Strauss. Oh God, the shrink. We'll all wind up in a mental hospital.'_

Mia groaned as she rolled her eyes, _'Relax Princess, Millie knows what she's doing. She is after all the Gatekeeper.'_

 _'What?'_ Emily asked.

 _'You do know what a Gatekeeper is don't you?'_ Mia asked annoyed.

 _'Of course,'_ Emily said _'I've dealt with cases before about D.I.D'_

 _'Ugh you are not going to drag up Tobias Hankle or that Adam guy now?'_ Mia said _'We're not them_.'

 _'I never said we were'_ Emily said walking to the window, seeing the BAU bullpen and elevator _'Hey! JJ? JJ? Millie let me out!'_

 _'Shout all you want, she's not going to let you out'_ Mia said leaning against the cage _'Not yet at least.'_

Sighing as she stared out the window, she could see Hotch and the team stare at her before the elevator closed, turning her back to the window she looked at the cage.

 _'So now what?'_ Emily asked _'What's there to do in here?'_

 _'Nothing'_ Mia _'We just sit, watch and wait. Pretty boring, huh? Well now you get to view from the inside.'_

Groaning as she sunk to the floor, her back to the window, Emily looked at Mia and shook her head.

 _'What?'_ Mia said sitting on the ground in the cage, _'What the hell are you gawking at?_ '

 _'Wondering why you are the way you are.'_ Emily asked _'You're suppose to be a piece of my personality but I see nothing in you that is me.'_

Scoffing, Mia turned to face her, _'Keep telling yourself that, Princess. You put small pieces of yourself in Lauren, well that was me. Except for loving Doyle and that kid, Lauren and I are exactly alike. Power, control and the fantastic sex.'_

 _'None of that is me, though'_ Emily said running her hands over her temple, trying to take control over Millie.

 _'Stop trying to get out'_ Mia said _'She won't let you out, until she's accomplished whatever she set out to.'_

 _'Damn it'_ Emily muttered.

 _'As I was saying, you put pieces of yourself in Lauren. Loving Doyle's kid, the control and all that fantastic sex?'_ Mia said smirking, _'That was all you. That's me. Just like Millie's_ _compartmentalizing and control is just another piece of you.'_

Emily closed her eyes, _'Shut up, Mia.'_

 _'Can't run this time'_ Mia said _'You have to face the truth.'_

 _'Since when do you care?'_ Emily asked _'All you wanted was to be out to have your own fun.'_

Scoffing, _'I don't care? For months, I helped make plans and done everything to help keep you alive. I just wanted sometime for myself, to be out there.'_

 _'To have random sex with men?'_ Emily said raising an eyebrow at the alter _'And you think we're so much alike?'_

 _'Ok, so that wasn't the smartest plan, but it's a way to relieve stress for me. After all this time you can't even go out and do something fun.'_ Mia said shrugging.

 _'Well excuse me, I was running to save my life'_ Emily said _'And the lives of my friends.'_

Snorting a huff, _'And what was the excuse for the years before? Hm? That British hunk practically salivated over us, and what do you do? You hit ignore on the cell phone.'_

 _'Mick?'_ Emily asked _'Forget that. How the hell did we get on this topic anyways?'_

 _'Not much else to do here, except think and watch.'_ Mia said _'Oh look, Millie's heading into see that bitch boss.'_

* * *

**To Be Continued...**


	4. Facing The Truth

JJ and Millie stood outside of Strauss' door, awaiting her approval to enter.

Turning to the brunette, JJ asked, "Are you sure you're ready?"

"I am more then ready to return to the BAU." Millie said to the blonde.

JJ's questioning gaze at the brunette was cut off by Strauss' appearance.

"Agent Jareau, Agent Prentiss please come in." Strauss said returning to her chair.

"Thank you, Ma'am." JJ said as the two sat down.

"Agent Prentiss" Strauss said "First of all I want to commend you on your safe return. I know it goes for the director and the others that we are all glad you're safe."

"Thank you, Chief Strauss." Millie said in her monotone voice, raising an eyebrow from both Strauss and JJ.

"Anyways, we here at the Bureau would be thrilled if you'd like to return" Strauss said "We understand if you were hesitant and had some misgivings about returning. But suffice it to say we hope for your return."

"I'd love to return, ma'am." Millie said "I'm more than ready to get back to work."

"Good." Strauss said opening up her drawer "You'll just need to sign these papers and have mandatory counseling until Dr. Lane deems you capable."

"Certainly." Millie said, "Will there be anything else, ma'am?"

That caught JJ by surprise, and she looked over at Strauss' own surprised face.

"Agent Prentiss?" Strauss said "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, Chief Strauss." Millie said "I thank you for your concern."

"Well if there's nothing else" Strauss said "Fill out your paper work and you can hand it to Agent Hotchner to give to me."

"Certainly, ma'am." Millie said getting up "Ma'am."

The two women watch Millie walk and both exchange a look.

 

Hotch sat in the break room talking to Dave when both men look up to see Millie enter the break room and head over to the coffee pot.

"Emily?" Dave said "How'd everything go with Chief Strauss? She didn't give you too hard of a time, did she?"

Millie turned to face Dave, placing the coffee mug on the counter, "Chief Strauss was more than adequate and fair. She welcomed me right back. I better get ready for my interview with Dr. Lane."

The two men watch her stroll out of the break room and nearly bump into Reid.

"My apologies." Millie said "Reid."

 _'She needs to stop doing that'_ Emily said watching from the window _'They're getting suspicious.'_

 _'She does a lousy job of impersonating you.'_ Mia said sighing.

"Emily?" Reid said warily "Are you still you?"

"Excuse me?" Millie said eyeing the young profiler "What do you mean?"

"You seem different." Reid said "Like another person."

 _'Uh oh'_ Mia said _'Reid's figure it out.'_

 _'She's not going to hurt him, right?'_ Emily asked.

 _'We've never faced this before.'_ Mia said _'People always believed what they saw.'_

Millie looked down and tried to imitate Emily's sarcasm "I still look like me, so it must still be me."

Reid looked at her closely and asked, "What did I tell you the doctors said about my headaches?"

Looking puzzled by his words Millie said, "That they were just headaches?"

Reid pushed back, away from the woman, "No I told you that they couldn't find anything conclusive. I told you this before you disappeared to fight Doyle."

Sighing, Millie said "Well I've had a lot on my mind since then, Reid."

 _'He's figuring it out, Millie.'_ Emily said _'You need to let me back out. Before it's too late.'_

"I've got to go." Millie said feeling Emily fight for control "I've got to meet with the shrink."

Reid watched as Millie hurried down the corridors that led to the Bureau psychiatrist.

 

Reid walked into the break room seeing Hotch and Dave share a concerned look.

"You see it too." Dave asked Reid "Something is off with her."

Frowning, Hotch looked over at the two men, "Well what the hell is it? We all can see it, but what is it?"

"It's almost like she's..." Reid said stating out loud then quietly "It's just like them."

"What?" Hotch asked.

"Who?" Dave asked.

"Adam and Tobias Hankle." Reid said out loud.

"What?" Hotch asked in confusion "What about them?"

"She's like two different people." Reid said "One's the Emily we know..."

"And the other is someone cold, aloof and professional." JJ said walking into the break room "I heard you three."

"No" Hotch said looking at everyone "Emily does not have split personalities."

"It makes so much sense now." JJ said "When I picked her up from the airport she kept getting these pained looks on her face. She kept saying it was just a headache."

"And in the bullpen when Morgan said..." Reid added "And right before she went in Dave's office, I saw it. So did you two."

Hotch rubbed his hands over his face, "Are you sure?"

"Hotch, she keeps rubbing her temples" JJ said softly "Saying it's just headaches."

Dave shook his head in disbelief "We can't just out right confront her about this, she's liable to take off."

"Well if this is true," Hotch said not believing it himself "She can't work for the FBI if she's sick. We have to watch her carefully for now. We don't want to scare her off."

"So, we do what?" JJ asked "We know that she's talking to the Bureau shrink, do we tell her?"

"We may have to," Hotch said "But the most important thing right now is to be there for her, watch her."

 

Millie walked out of the doctor's office, sighing "Thank God. Free at last. I did it, Emily. We're free. No one will get in the way, not if they know what's good for them."

Millie walked past the offices heading back to the bullpen to ensure a few more things for Emily.

Walking into the bullpen she saw Morgan and Garcia talking at Morgan's desk.

"Hey gumdrop." Garcia said brightly "Everything good?"

"Fine, thank you." Millie said walking to Emily's desk and sitting down.

"Are you sure you're ok?" Morgan asked noticing the odd behavior in Emily.

"Yes, I'm fine." Millie said looking at the paper work on Emily's desk.

 _'Millie'_ Emily said _'People are starting to suspect, you need to let me out.'_

Millie tuned Emily's voice out when she noticed Hotch, Dave and JJ walking up to Hotch's office, while Reid walked over to Morgan and Garcia.

 _'See that Millie?'_ Emily said _'They know. I can tell, see that scared look on Reid's face?'_

Millie looked from Reid's face as he spoke lightly to Morgan and Garcia, and notices their reactions.

Millie's mind clicked when she hears Garcia gasp and Morgan looking out the corner of his eye to her.

Looking up into Hotch's office, Millie saw the three agents turn away from her as their talking.

 _'Emily's right,_ _Millie'_ Mia's voice said _'You need to get away now.'_

Millie picked up her bag, and headed for the glass doors.

"Gumdrop?" Garcia called out cautiously "Where are you going?"

' _Millie'_ Emily said loudly _'Let me out.'_

"Bathroom." Millie said hating this feeling of guilt as she failed Emily "I'll be right back."

 

Hotch looked down in the bullpen and saw Emily or the person in Emily's body, walk out of the bullpen and seen Morgan look up at him with fear in his eyes.

Sighing, Hotch said, "I better follow her."

Hotch left the bullpen, following the brunette out, hurrying fast he noticed that she was running quickly.

 _'You're a planner, Millie'_ Emily said _'But you never made a plan for this.'_

Millie paced the bathroom, "There's no room for error. That's why every action has a reaction. If these federal agents know that Emily has dissociative identity disorder, that will be a problem. And this is a problem that we cannot afford. It's time to leave the Bureau."

 _'What do you mean leave?'_ Emily asked _'We can't just run away.'_

 _'Maybe not. But we can't sit around like a bump on a log, they'll come after us.'_ Mia added.

 _'Let me out, Millie. I can deal with them'_ Emily said.

"The best plan is one that's kept in the dark from everyone" Millie said "I made such contingencies a long time ago, we must make sure that no one ever finds us."

 _'What are you going to do?'_ Emily asked _'Millie? Millie?'_

"You both need to rest now" Millie said "I've got it from here."

The sound of the cell phone ringing pulled Millie out of her planning, looking down "Agent Hotchner."

 _'Hotch?'_ Emily said _'Millie let me talk to him, he can help.'_

 _'Millie?'_ Mia said _'What are you going to do?'_

Millie walked over to the bathroom stall and threw the phone into the toilet "Emily can't come to the phone right now."

 

Turning around as she left the stall she heard Emily say, _'What did you do?'_

"Controlling your impulses is a simple task. You just remove the temptation. Throw it out a window. If you don't see the phone you won't have the urge to pick it up" Millie said "Problem solved. You don't have to thank me, no one ever does."

 _'Millie, you didn't have to do that'_ Emily said _'Aren't you going to let me come back out?'_

"Not yet" Millie said "My job is to have all the answers, and since right now we're all in a transition, I can't let you come back out, not until this answer is solved."

 _'Millie, you don't have to do this...'_ Emily started.

 _'Save it, Princess'_ Mia said _'Once Millie's mind is made up there's no stopping her.'_

"That's why we have to put as much distance between Emily and her Federal friends as possible" Millie said "We'll start over some place else, somewhere safe."

"Like hell you will" Hotch said causing the brunette alter to turn around.

 _'Hotch'_ Emily said _'Thank God you're here.'_

 _'Save your breath, Stone Cold can't hear us'_ Mia said.

"Something I can help you with, sir?" Millie said.

"Save it," Hotch said "I know you're not Emily. So who are you?"

"Someone that Emily can rely on" Millie said walking to the mirror and fixing her hair into a bun "Someone who will ensure her survival at all cost."

"You're the one who helped her kill Doyle?" Hotch asked watching the brunette turn around and straighten herself up.

"I merely provided the most suitable plan of action" Millie said "Now if you'll excuse me Agent Hotchner, we have to be going now."

"We?" Hotch asked "How about you tell me your name?"

"You can call me Millie" Millie said picking up the purse.

Grabbing her arm, "Well, Millie, you're not going anywhere not until I talk to Emily."

 

Morgan walked around in the bullpen, trying to rack his brain at the idea that Emily Prentiss had multiple personalities.

"This just doesn't make sense" Garcia said "How can someone as strong as Emily have multiple personalities?"

"Dissociative Identity Disorder" Reid corrected her "Can be caused by extreme post traumatic stress, anxiety, depersonalization. Think about it, having to portray Lauren Reynolds for so long, she literally had to be another person."

"She had headaches when I saw her in the airport" JJ added "She seemed to have this far away look like something was going on but she just kept saying she was fine."

"But what if she had this before then?" Dave asked "JJ, you once said that when Reid was taken by that unsub Hankle that you asked Emily how she can see all this horrible stuff and deal with it and that she said she compartmentalized it better than others..."

"Right" JJ said "Hotch even said it surprised him how none of this fazed her."

"That could be one of her alters" Reid said "Most commonly when someone has D.I.D. their will be an alter who's the most powerful alter, a Gatekeeper, who decides which alter comes out and their job is to protect the host personality at all cost. To a Gatekeeper nothing fazes them, their sole focus is on the host."

"What I want to know" Morgan said "Is how the hell a grown woman just up and get this split personality thing?"

"Well," Reid said "Look at the world Emily grew up in, a cold distant, workaholic mother. Thrusted into the world of politics at such a young age. She probably dissasociate it from herself, made herself believe that it was never happening to her. Lack of parental affection can cause damage on a young child."

Morgan nodded in agreement, "So what do we do? How do we help her?"

"Well Hotch followed her" JJ said "So we'll just have to see where this goes."

"Wait a minute" Garcia said "Hankle had two personalites, how do we even know if Emily has more than one?"

"We don't know until we get her to a hospital" Dave said rubbing his forehead.

 

"Excuse me?" Millie asked looking down at the hand he placed on her arm "I believe it would be wise, Agent Hotchner that you remove your hand from me."

 _'Let me out, Millie'_ Emily said _'I want out, now. I'm not going to stop shouting until you let me the hell out.'_

"Be quiet, Emily" Millie muttered "I'm trying to fix this."

Hotch stared at the woman, surprised to hear this type of cold aloof tone from Emily, but he knew it wasn't Emily.

"I want to talk to Emily" Hotch told Millie turning her around to face him, ignoring the dark gaze of someone he cared about, he held on tight "Let me talk to Emily. I know she's in there. Emily talk to me, Emily?"

 _'Someone out there needs me, I'm going to fight my way out'_ Emily said _'Even if I have to kick my own ass to do it.'_

"Emily needs me and she always will" Millie said "No one can protect her like I can."

"Emily has people out here who love her and can help her" Hotch said "I need her, I need Emily."

"You only want her for one thing" Millie said coldly "She needs protection. You couldn't even protect your own family, how do you expect you protect her?"

"Because I can" Hotch said "I care about her and I won't let you take her away from me."

"Stop" Millie said pulling at her arms out his hands "Please leave."

"She's fighting you, isn't she?" Hotch said "Emily, fight. Come back."

Millie's face contorted in pain, feeling Emily fight her way out because of Hotch's words, "Let me out."

"I want to talk to Emily" Hotch said pulling the brunette close to him "Emily?"

 _'Hey, what about me?'_ Mia said _'I want out too.'_

"Shut up" Emily said to Mia, feeling herself returning, not looking at Hotch.

"Emily, come back. Emily?" Hotch said again "Talk to me."

 _'We can live on the run for as long as we have to'_ Millie told Emily _'We can make this plan work.'_

"I'm not going on the run again" Emily said quietly opening her eyes "Hotch?"

"Emily?" Hotch asked relieved "Emily, is that really you?"

"Yes" Emily said feeling her emotions reach to the surface "Oh, God I'm so sorry."

Hotch pulled Emily into a hug, both not turning around when they heard the door open, revealing JJ and Morgan who backed up watching the team leader.

"Emily?" Hotch said pulling back to look at her, seeing the tears in her eyes that she refused to shed "Are you ok?"

"I need help" Emily said quietly "I really need help."

JJ pulled Morgan away from the door, looking at the male profiler, she saw relief on his face and whispered "What?"

"She finally asked for help" Morgan said as the two wandered into the bullpen "It's a big step for her."

 

Hotch pulled Emily into a big hug, "We're going to get you help. You're not going to go through this alone."

"But I can't stay at the BAU, right?" Emily said quietly feeling Hotch rub her back, "Not while I'm sick."

"When you get better, you can." Hotch said "I'll make sure of it."

"I have to go away again." Emily said feeling Hotch kiss her forehead affectionately.

"Just for a little while." Hotch said picking up her bag, walking themselves out of the bathroom towards the elevator.

"I don't want to leave again." Emily told him.

"This time you won't go through this by yourself" Hotch told her, "You have the team, and me. We're not going to lose you again, I'm not going to lose you again."

 

The team sat in the bullpen, each lost in their own thoughts on Emily's return and her dilemma.

"There she is" Reid said watching Hotch and Emily walk down the hall towards the elevators.

"Are you sure, it's Emily?" Garcia asked JJ.

"I'd know her voice anywhere." Morgan said "And that was definitely Emily."

"She asked Hotch for help" JJ said "I think everything's going to be better from now on."

"Well, when she gets better, will she allowed to return to the BAU?" Garcia asked.

"I don't know" JJ admitted "That would be a first."

"I think I can swing a way around that" Dave said heading up to his office "I've got a few favors I can call in."

"Look at that" Garcia said dragging JJ close to her.

The two blondes saw Hotch pulling Emily close to him in the elevators, hugging her as the doors closed.

"That looks promising" Garcia said "A little something new, maybe?"

JJ shook her head, holding a small smile on her face, "How about we just get through this one day at a time. And when she comes back then we can needle them about a romance, ok?"

"You're no fun" Garcia said sitting down at a desk.

 

"May I help you?" a woman in a white shirt said.

"Yes," Emily said holding Hotch's hand "My name is Emily Prentiss, and I need to check myself in."

Hotch held her hand, while Emily filled out the paper work handing it back to the woman.

"You sit right down over there and a doctor will come out to talk to you" the woman said.

Emily and Hotch walked over to the small couch, as she sat down Hotch sat next to her, holding her close.

"Emily Prentiss?" a doctor said "My name is Dr. Rubin and I'll be your primary doctor here at the Wellstone Facility. Why don't we go step in my office and talk over your treatment, ok?"

"Ok" Emily said getting up, she turned around with a sigh "I guess I have to go now Hotch. Thanks for your help."

Hotch pulled Emily to him, "I'll be waiting here for you when you're ready to come home."

"You amaze me" Emily said kissing him on the lips, "Goodbye."

Hotch stood there in shock, watching until the door closed separating him from Emily, a renewed hope filled his heart.

"No, you amaze me, Emily" Hotch said thrusting his hands in his pockets as he turned to go and tell the team that Emily was going to be ok now.

* * *

"You have power over your mind - not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength," Marcus Aurelius

* * *

**The End**


End file.
